June 2013
12 posts
imagine a dragon trying to blow up balloons but they keep setting on fire
it’s really sad
also imagine it trying to blow out the candles on its birthday cake
their birthdays must be awful
imagine dragons
i’m waking up
to ash and dust
I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust
im breathing in the chemicals
Play
3:41
OH MY GOD
IT SHAKES WHEN YOU DO ALT+CLICK TO REBLOG NOW.
IT. SHAKES.
LIKE A VOLCANO READY TO ERUPT.
LIKE PIKACHU PREPARING TO ATTACK.
LIKE A SMALL CHILD GETTING A SHIVER IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT.
IT JUMPS OUT OF MY SCREEN WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
AND THE SHARE ICON MOVES CASUALLY OUT THE WAY AS IT SHAKES
May 2013
40 posts
my brother just walked in here with a bunch of pancakes and was like ‘wow this is a whole lot of pancakes’ and then he closed his eyes and whispered to himself ‘but i am a whole lot of man’
you guys all think that canada is so innocent but in grade one i had a geography teacher with three fingers and he gave me a C because i pronounced Kenya differently than him and when my mom reported it to the office we found out that he wasn’t even supposed to be teaching at my school he was literally some stranger who wandered in
once i was at a party and they asked me what my dad did for a living and said that he died when i was 12 and of course i hear the collective “aaawww im so sorry”
and then i hear some girl whisper from the back “you’re halfway to becoming batman”
AND THAT IS HOW I MET ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS MORAL OF THE STORY IS IF YOU USE BLACK HUMOUR I WILL LOVE YOU
i’ve never seen anyone steal candy from a baby
i asked my italian grandfather if the rough parts of italy were called the spaghetto and he looked at me w/ so much shame
